Sorry, Liver! Here’s Our GOP Debate Drinking Game

Another Saturday night debate, another excuse to get politically inebriated. Last week, we did pretty well on our BINGO card (just a few squares were left untouched), but then, who could have predicted Jeb!’s plan to mint millionaires or the spectacle that was Robot Rubio?

With Chris Christie’s tap out, Donald Trump’s trumping Ted Cruz in New Hampshire and Marco Rubio’s repetition ramifications, we anticipate that tomorrow night’s debate—which will feature a relatively slender six-man stage—should be rich in sideways punches, completely bombastic claims about national security, and likely a hefty dose of economic policies and ideas that are packaged for the little guy but, in truth, only serve to benefit the wealthy.

Moderators for tomorrow night will be Face the Nation anchor John Dickerson, CBS News White House correspondent Major Garrett, and, interestingly, The Wall Street Journal‘s Kimberley Strassel, who has been extremely critical of Cruz in the past. It’s going to fiery, to be sure.

For this weekend’s viewing, I figured I’d go ahead and stop pretending that any of us are watching these Saturday night GOP debates in any form of sobriety, and just made us a drinking game. All you’ll need is a beer or glass of wine, a shot glass, some form of hard liquor, and probably a grilled cheese sandwich or some other hearty food to line your gut.

(For those among us who don’t imbibe, yes, this game works with mocktails and family-friendly beverages, too. Just make a really tall glass of soda-and-non-alcoholic-bitters and join in. As for the shots, can I suggest a nice demitasse of espresso?)

Here’s the game board:

And as always, you can follow us on Twitter (I’ll be tweeting, too). Good luck and godspeed.